How Do I Save My Relationship From Bad Gossip?

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Gossip is TOXIC, to say the least. Everyday, relationships and families get broken because of gossip. I hope and pray that you never find yourself under public scrutiny, and are never the cause of bad gossip, but I understand that oftentimes, these are things you can’t control. So here are a few tips to help you know how to save your relationship from bad gossip.   1. DON’T gossip about others. I really believe the golden rule, “Don’t do unto others what you do not want them to do unto you.” Another ideology that treads this same concept is karma: “What goes around, comes around.” If you don’t want to be gossiped about, then DON’T GOSSIP. If you gossip about others, it automatically puts you and your relationship under scrutiny and comparison. You’ll likely be gossiped about sooner or later if you carry this attitude around. I’m telling you, DROP IT. It’ll feel much more liberating, too.   2. Don’t publicize your whole life! In this day and age, with the pervasive influence of social media on our lives, social media influencers make us feel like if you don’t post it, it didn’t happen. I’m here to tell you that this is absolute nonsense and complete B.S.! Life is meant to be lived in real life, not on Instagram, and certainly not for the likes. The best way to save your relationship from gossip is to prevent it from being a source of gossip to begin with. By posting just about EVERYTHING in your love life online, your life becomes meat for anyone and everyone to pick on. I’m not saying this is right for people to do — I condone gossip in any way, shape or form — but you have to understand that this is reality. If you lay yourself out to bare, expect people to talk. For instance, if you post a status on Facebook about a horrible fight you’ve had with your boyfriend, don’t you think that instantly becomes ‘public knowledge’ for people to just talk about? Gossipers will stop at nothing, too. Even if you post about everything (even the happy ones) expect your happy posts to be a subject of scrutiny. My suggestion is, try as much as possible to keep your relationship out of social media. Out of sight, out of mind.   3. Rid your life of toxic gossipers. However, while I advocate lessening your use of social media, especially when it comes to your relationship, I understand that things have changed — posting about your life may simply mean you want to document it, right? If this is the case, then I suggest that you do a social media purge. Look at your friends and your followers: if there is a serial gossiper among them, just delete him or her and move on. This is the easiest, and simplest way to go about it.   4. Try not to do anything controversial. This is a simple tip: to save your relationship from bad gossip, don’t do anything worthy of bad gossip. Don’t make a scene (especially publicly!), and try not to do anything scandalous. However, I know that life doesn’t really work this way because everyone makes mistakes, so my next tip is…   5. Keep your private life PRIVATE. This is important: remember that your private life and the matters regarding your relationship are intimate and are precious. Choose who you share this information with! Before you start opening up to any Jack or Jill out in the street, evaluate the person first — Does this person really know me and my relationship? Does this person want only what’s best for me? Is this person a true friend? Can I trust this person? The best way to save your relationship from bad gossip is to entrust information about these matters to people who know you and love you — people you can really trust. This way, you’ll be sure they will handle the information with utmost respect and privacy.   6. Lastly, don’t get bogged down by it if you know it’s not true. Sometimes, people are just bored out of their wits, and have nothing to do but talk about other people. If you find yourself in a situation where you’re talked about, but you know in your heart that the rumors they are spreading aren’t true, rise above it and let it go.   Sometimes, the best revenge for serial gossipers is to keep quiet, and to continue living happily. Continue to improve your relationship and your life, and keep growing as an individual and as a couple. The happier you are, the angrier it will be for those serial gossipers! Before I go, I’d like to leave you with this quote to help you feel more at peace: “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt Don’t be a small mind, Hot Nerd. And don’t get affected by small minds either. [/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]