When you’re old enough, you’ll learn that choosing a guy to go steady with is not about having everything in one person, it’s about knowing your priorities.
The reality is, there is no such thing as a perfect guy. You may have met a really nice and intelligent guy who doesn’t have the greatest of looks; or a really handsome guy who’s as dull as dishwater. And perhaps in this case, you may have found yourself an intelligent, nice, handsome guy who isn’t too wealthy. What do you do now, right?
Well, I’m here to tell you that the ball is in your court. It’s up to you to straighten out your priorities to see if his wealth (or lack of it) proves to be a deal-breaker. If it is, I don’t see any point in carrying on. Break it off and move forward. But if you want to test the waters to see if this will work out in the end, then read on.
Wealth isn’t everything: always remember that. Character trumps wealth any day, in my opinion. Wealth can be built and earned; character is harder to change. If you have a guy with good character, but isn’t the wealthiest one out there, here are a few tips to learn to make dating him a more enjoyable experience.
1. See him beyond the money he earns. I’d just like to reiterate: character trumps money any day. So, instead of dwelling on how much he has in the bank, turn your attention to his admirable qualities. Highlight his intelligence, his charm or his wit instead.
2. Learn to date creatively. Some of the most memorable dates I’ve been on were the cheapest ones: a picnic in the park, stargazing at night, museum hopping… be creative with how you date! You don’t have to wine and dine in every 4- or 5-star restaurant out there to have a good time.
I understand that sometimes, we ladies like to be pampered, but I’m sure that a little planning can go a long way. How about a cooking date? Buy a steak and some pasta in the grocery and whip yourself up a 5-star meal at home! And follow it up with a romantic walk in your neighborhood… a full romantic experience at ⅓ the price of some fancy restaurant, right? In my experience, I’ve learned that luxury need not come with the price.
3. Fill your dates with deep, meaningful conversations. One thing I find really attractive in a man is his ability to converse. If he can get on my wavelength, then the rest of the relationship will become much easier to handle. If you fill your dates with good, impressionable conversations, then the dialogue (and your impression of him) shifts from material things like money and assets, to, well, LIFE! There’s nothing better than being able to talk to a guy about literature, philosophy, history and psychology. I think that’s a much better ‘wealth’ than wealth is. Plus, you’ll be able to tell from these conversations if you have someone who is educated and driven. The best asset a guy has is his brain, don’t you think?
4. Learn how to build him up. One of the key things about a relationship is that your opinion matters, or it at least should matter. So you should learn how to encourage him and support him in whatever dreams and aspirations he shares with you. Gently nudge him, and tell him he can do anything he sets his mind to! If you inspire him to better his craft, and if you encourage him to pursue his dreams, then the money will follow. I’m telling you — build him up, and he will have the tools to build an empire.
I can’t stress enough how a good, healthy relationship can work wonders on individuals. If you learn how to inspire each other, and build each other up instead of criticize each other for shortcomings, then your personal life and your relationship can really go places.
That said, I’m convinced that money can be earned, with the right motivation and inspiration. Be a positive influence on your guy, and I’m convinced he will go places!